Comeback Challenge Round 41 The Case of the Untuned Stone

You heard it here first, folks. Even the rocks are singing ITunes to the ladies. Except in this case, our mission is to tune said stone and leave it untuned........turned......tuned. Whatever. This batch of bachelors left me batty. See what I mean? Good luck! 1. I've posted ten headlines and/or essay snippets below. Spelling errors are from original profiles and not my own. Write a comedic response to any or all of these. 2. You have until 11:59 pm MONDAY EDT to send in your answers via email. VERY IMPORTANT: Type "Saturday Comeback Challenge" in the subject line and include the name and url of your blog. 3. I try to keep this as family-friendly as possible without sacrificing humor. I will not post inappropriate or sexually explicit responses. Subtle is good! 4. I will announce the winner in Wednesday's post. You will get a link back to your site, a permanent place in my sidebar, and a winner's badge for your blog --plus untold fame and glory! Mostly untold. 1. Bored, time for a woman. 2. I am the only me you will ever meet. 3. Musician Chef seeks girl with ears and mouth 4. Wanted: Someone To Share My Kool-Aid With 5. I don't normally talk unless I have something to say 6. Make My Heart Go Thump Thump 7. Leave No Stone Untuned! 8. Take Life By the Horns and Grab Me 9. There are days that I don't know what town I'll be in until I wake up in it. 10. Walking Fool Tie-Breaker: I Don't Need Batteries