August 14, 2006

Bachelor #17 "I don't claim to be the Dally Lama of love."


Could I date a man who misspells deity? I think not. All spelling errors being equal, can we talk?

First of all, I apologize to His Holiness, the Dalai Lama. According to Tibetan tradition, an authentic spiritual leader chooses to reincarnate to serve the people, not reappear in dating profiles unannounced and undefended.
This is definitely not a God Wink.

No one usually misspells Jesus or Pope or even Brad Pitt.....sigh....but I did receive a letter once from an Asian man who wanted to marry a "Bapteese" lady from the states. That was not a God Wink either, nor was it a wink I returned.

At this point, I'd settle for just a manifestation of someone devoted to spellchecker. An apparition perhaps.

Reincarnation is not such a bad idea in this case – as long as I get to inspect previous baggage – except that I’m not sure I want this particular karma returned to earth. Although, he does admit to being less than perfect (remember? He did start with an honest disclaimer of his Dallyan love qualifications). Hmm…since my persuasion is more hell fire and damnation and it’s not clear to me exactly how you go about making sure the person you THINK is the real thing is indeed the real thing once they do appear (DUH) – easy for His Holiness, apparently, he had signs and wonders - not so for humble Mimi - I do seem to be having a rough time even striking up a spark, much less rekindling a cosmic flame.
Baptist karma is not paying off.

Maybe it’s time to reinvent my destiny. I’m not a Buddhist but once went shopping with a cousin of a step-cousin’s father who believed he was Marilyn Monroe in a former life.
 Does that count?

Let's see.......whom shall I pick?
........Think literary, literary, intelligence…..I’ve got it!
Walt Whitman.
No, somehow that seems all wrong.
Jonathan Edwards? No….Too controlling. But he was a fiery soul for sure.
Hmm…… Rhett Butler (oh, he wasn't real). No problem. He'll fit right in.

I’m stumped. I give up. I'm drowning in a sea of wannabe prophets who kiss their pets and want to parade me as tattoo candy (#9); men with dental problems and children who sleep in the woods, bald men with frisky combs (#6) outdoorsy rebels who tie their own flies!! (#2) and now, literary cowboys who don’t even know how to drop a name.

Duck. Flying grape approaching.

And why WOULD a man want to admit that he WASN'T the "Dally Lama" of love?? What a missed opportunity for greatness and so unlike a male. He could have at least reached into his cyber bag of tricks to promote his heavenly quest.
I'm always complaining to my girlfriends that men aren't "real" enough. Maybe I should stop praying for real and ask God to throw in a really good liar every now and then. Do you think I could reverse the karma somehow?
Reverse cyberology. It's worth a try.

I may need spiritual advice on this one, before I do something to throw the entire dating world off kilter. I need someone with an Ocean of Wisdom.
Do you think the Dalai Lama is busy this morning?

2 comments:

Amanda said...

so funny! it doesn't even make sense, what has a celibate monk got to do with dating?

Mimi Lenox said...

The consensus on the senses is that I am not quite YET out of the male census (!)...but "sense" you ask.....I apparently don't have far to go!
Thanks for reading Dating Profile of the Day. Readers encourage me to keep writing! Hope you enjoy.