Comeback Challenge Round 29 Winners I Would, But.....

I'll admits this week's challenge was tough. But that's why we call it a challenge. A sea of bachelors adrift in a swarm of exotic wood....or is that would...driftwood? But! One of you won hands down. Who will it be? I wood tell you butt ......Read on. Oh brother.


Contestant #1 My Life As We Think I Know It
1. I never thought this would be like writing my own eulogy.
You're dead to me =1
 2. i'm a reel good fixer. lived in in old house. Fixed it. old car. fixed it. chikens. fixed it. had a wife. fixed it. I puddy much done it.
Good, then you don't need me =2


3. I'm usually on the run on the weekends. A few years ago I was in Egypt.
Where are you during the week so we can tell the authorities? =1

4. My eyes are green with blue around the outside, and are big and flashy.
What are you, a bug? =1

5. Must love Boxers.
Only the rich unconscious ones...briefly stated =3


6. I love to cook and make my woman laugh.
Burn yourself and she will. =1


7. , i'm a hell of a talker, and i've actually hit a point in my life where i won't try to get you drunk and in bed the first or second date. third, probably, but still, that's pretty good for me.
You might want to go back to your original plan, don't think you'll get many second dates. =1

8. Don't need to marry butt wood
Calm down Paul Bunyan, no reason to be anal about your job =1

9. I have a bald head but it's sexy.
Pervert! =1

10. Why walk when you can run?
Thanks for the advice...C-ya =1

Tie-Breaker: Do you know where my missing rib is?
Oops Sorry, the dog and I were only playing fetch. =2

Total points for Sp1nners = 13
Contestant #2 Anyhow Blogs
1. I never thought this would be like writing my own eulogy.
I never thought this would be as boring as reading an eulogy. =3
 
2. i'm a reel good fixer. lived in in old house. Fixed it. old car. fixed it. chikens. fixed it. had a wife. fixed it. I puddy much done it.
But if you're such a good fixer, I wonder why you still haven't fixed your 'single and unwanted' status. =1
3. I'm usually on the run on the weekends. A few years ago I was in Egypt.
And to think the cops still haven't discovered that you were the one who stole the Sphinx's nose. =1
4. My eyes are green with blue around the outside, and are big and flashy.
And now when I snap my fingers, you will awake and stop believing that you are a goldfish. *SNAP* =2
5. Must love Boxers.
I do. Why don't you come over and I'll let my championship boxer boyfriend give you a tip or 2 about how to bash someone's face in? =1
 
6. I love to cook and make my woman laugh.
I wouldn't mind watch you make a fool of yourself in the kitchen but after that YOU do all the cleaning up and finish the leftovers. =1
 
7. , i'm a hell of a talker, and i've actually hit a point in my life where i won't try to get you drunk and in bed the first or second date. third, probably, but still, that's pretty good for me.
It doesn't matter whether it's the first or third date, the problem is, you need to find someone who is willing to date you first. =3
 
8. Don't need to marry butt wood
But you would be better off marrying a teacher, who could teach you how to spell basic words correctly. =1
 
9. I have a bald head but it's sexy.
But still not as sexy as your round, protruding beer belly. =1
 
10. Why walk when you can run?
Because running can get me further away from you than walking would in the same amount of time. =2
Tie-Breaker: Do you know where my missing rib is?
I think I saw it in the lost and found section together with your brain and your sense of humour.=2
Total points for Anyhow = 16
Contestant #3 Sitting on The Couch


I never thought this would be like writing my own eulogy.
I never thought I would be reading such drivel =1

2. i'm a reel good fixer. lived in in old house. Fixed it. old car. fixed it. chikens. fixed it. had a wife. fixed it. I puddy much done it.
See now, the chickens really scare me. =2

3. I'm usually on the run on the weekends. A few years ago I was in Egypt .
And you made it back here all on your own? =1

14. My eyes are green with blue around the outside, and are big and flashy.
Like one of those cabbage patch dolls? = 1

5. Must love Boxers.
It will be a long time before we get there… =1

6. I love to cook and make my woman laugh
I get a giggle from exploding grease fires. =1

7. , i'm a hell of a talker, and i've actually hit a point in my life where i won't try to get you drunk and in bed the first or second date. third, probably, but still, that's pretty good for me.
Nice that we have established this relationship will not last longer then two dates. =1

8. Don't need to marry butt wood
There are so many things wrong with this statement, I do not know where to start. =1

9. I have a bald head but it's sexy.
Another in a multitude =1

10. Why walk when you can run?
Thanks for the suggestion, off I go =2

Tie-Breaker: Do you know where my missing rib is?
Probably with your missing brain. =2


Bond's Total Points -= 12



Contestant #4 1. I never thought this would be like writing my own eulogy.
Cause he’s got Hiiii-gh hopes, (remember this song) =1

2. i'm a reel good fixer. lived in in old house. Fixed it. old car. fixed it. chikens. fixed it. had a wife. fixed it. I puddy much done it.
I really don’t know what to say… =1

3. I'm usually on the run on the weekends. A few years ago I was in Egypt.
That’s one hell of a weekend! =1

4. My eyes are green with blue around the outside, and are big and flashy.
So someone punched you in both eyes and you’re still seeing stars =1

5. Must love Boxers.
Sports, shorts or dogs? =2

6. I love to cook and make my woman laugh.
I heard the fire department laughed too. =2

7. , i'm a hell of a talker, and i've actually hit a point in my life where i won't try to get you drunk and in bed the first or second date. third, probably, but still, that's pretty good for me.
That you got a third date is pretty good for you. =3

8. Don't need to marry butt wood
Butt wood, not familiar with that species of tree =1


9. I have a bald head but it's sexy.
Code talk: ( I make this comb-over look good) =1

10. Why walk when you can run?
I couldn’t agree more, I’m running…away. =2

-Breaker: Do you know where my missing rib is?
Probably someplace I would rather be at too. =1
SGT DUB's Total Points = 15
Bud ~ WTIT Tape Radio ~ The Silent Contestant


See Bud's post complete with pictures and commentary HERE.1. I never thought this would be like writing my own eulogy.
That is because no one gets out of internet dating sites alive.

2. i'm a reel good fixer. lived in in old house. Fixed it. old car. fixed it. chikens. fixed it. had a wife. fixed it. I puddy much done it.
You’ve done it alright, a new high in lows for stupidty.

3. I'm usually on the run on the weekends. A few years ago I was in Egypt.
Now that, my friends, is a (bleep) long run.

4. My eyes are green with blue around the outside, and are big and flashy.
Neon eyes. Got it. Next!

5. Must love Boxers.
Even Mike Tyson?

6. I love to cook and make my woman laugh.
Your cuisine must be awful. The eat a bite, spit it out, laugh at you and run away. That’s about it, isn’t it?

7. , i'm a hell of a talker, and i've actually hit a point in my life where i won't try to get you drunk and in bed the first or second date. third, probably, but still, that's pretty good for me.
This may be the all time brain-dead approach to meeting women.

8. Don't need to marry butt wood.
I don’t think you have anything to worry about here.

9. I have a bald head but it's sexy.
Talking to your mother again, aren’t you?

10. Why walk when you can run?
As in far away from you?

Tie-Breaker: Do you know where my missing rib is?
Right next to your missing brain.


1st place ANYHOW BLOGS with 16 points
2nd place SGT DUB with 15 points
3rd place Sp1nners (My Life As We Think I Know It) with 13 points