Comeback Challenge Round 25 Winners

Sometimes you think it can't get an weirder. And then it does. Let's get on with this weird competition. Each and every answer will be scored on a scale of one-to-three, three being the highest. The contestant with the highest score wins. Total scores do not include the tie-breaker score unless necessary. Did anyone make that perfect score of 30 points? We shall see. And now.....here comes the bride.

Bond's Big Leather Couch I don't know if I want to get married again.I can be ready in 10 minutes or less. OK, if I am not there in 12 minutes, start without me =2 2. When you wash the dishes it turns me on. When you start the car to leave, it turns me on. =2 3. I am new to the on-line scene and am not a bar hoper. My hope is that you jump over the bar and leave. =2 4. Life's trivial questions shall go unanswered for now. The basics though shall be revealed. I am not good at this but I shall give it a go. Confucius say trivial must be answered for basics to be revealed. As far as going, please do. =2 5. I wear nice cloths. Do you just drape them over your body like togas of the Roman times? =1 6. I'll just start off right now by apologizing, because I'm sure that I will screw up something or say something stupid, so I'm sorry. Too late. =3 7. I just turned 45, which is almost 7 in dog years. Actually, I think you are 7 in human years which is more than 45 in dog years. =2 8. My ideal match would look like an angle but the devil on the inside. So you want a woman who makes a right angle? =1 9. If you litter, or do not recycle, I will not like you. Yup, that's a deal breaker. Sometimes, I say things like yup, and dang it. Well, dang it, yup is a deal braker for me so I am putting you out with the trash. =3 10. i em a sempl man lock for a sempl woman to have fun weth go out to denr moves wach the sun set to gethr caping hiking boting bick riding woking wach tv i lock to cook b,b,q This is one of those “can you read this” tests, I have gotten emails about this. Let’s see if you can read this….NO. =3 TIE-BREAKER: RECENTLY SEPARATED, FROM MY BABY'S MAMA..NO, BUT REALLY....NEVER LIE,NEVER CHEAT,SMELL MY FEET. No, really…Hit the street =3 Bond's Total Points = 21 1. I don't know if I want to get married again. I can be ready in 10 minutes or less. Too bad, cos I'll be gone in 8 minutes. =2 2. When you wash the dishes it turns me on. Wow. Look, we have the world's first talking tap! =1 3. I am new to the on-line scene and am not a bar hoper. Which means to say you get drunk at the same bar every night? =1 4. Life's trivial questions shall go unanswered for now. The basics though shall be revealed. I am not good at this but I shall give it a go. I agree. Some questions SHOULD be left unanswered. Like why you still can't get a date and why all the girls are avoiding you. =2 5. I wear nice cloths. Too bad leopard and wolfskin loincloths are sooo out of fashion. =1 6. I'll just start off right now by apologizing, because I'm sure that I will screw up something or say something stupid, so I'm sorry. I'll just end by accepting your apology but making sure you stay out of my life. The trauma and shock that I will suffer will almost be too much to handle. =2 7. I just turned 45, which is almost 7 in dog years. Bark! Woof, Woof! Bark! Bark! Bark! Translated, it means 'And you'll probably have another 7 dogs years of singlehood' in dog language. =1 8. My ideal match would look like an angle but the devil on the inside. I doubt a square-headed match would be easier to light than a round one. And if you're into big flames, heres a tank of gasoline. =3 9. If you litter, or do not recycle, I will not like you. Yup, that's a deal breaker. Sometimes, I say things like yup, and dang it But the problem is, even if you don't litter and do loads of recycling, I will still not like you. =3 10. i em a sempl man lock for a sempl woman to have fun weth go out to denr moves wach the sun set to gethr caping hiking boting bick riding woking wach tv i lock to cook b,b,q If he locks the kitchen while cooking, you can difinitely be sure that the food isn't done by him, even if it was BBQ. =1 TIE-BREAKER: RECENTLY SEPARATED, FROM MY BABY'S MAMA..NO, BUT REALLY....NEVER LIE,NEVER CHEAT,SMELL MY FEET. Thanks but I'd rather smell my own feet over your stinkers anyday. =1 Anyhow's Total Points = 17 1. I don't know if I want to get married again. I can be ready in 10 minutes or less. I'm schizophrenic and so am I. = 3 2. When you wash the dishes it turns me on. Just wait until you see me mop the floor... =2 3. I am new to the on-line scene and am not a bar hoper. Is that something you do with a pogo stick? =1 4. Life's trivial questions shall go unanswered for now. The basics though shall be revealed. I am not good at this but I shall give it a go. Aww. So you won't tell me which is the right way to hang the toilet paper? Dang. = =2 5. I wear nice cloths. Dude, please put on some pants! You're scaring the cat. = 1 6. I'll just start off right now by apologizing, because I'm sure that I will screw up something or say something stupid, so I'm sorry. You're a man. It's always all your fault. =2 7. I just turned 45, which is almost 7 in dog years. Can you play dead? =3 8. My ideal match would look like an angle but the devil on the inside. Get bent. =3 9. If you litter, or do not recycle, I will not like you. Yup, that's a deal breaker. Sometimes, I say things like yup, and dang it Yup and dang it are a deal breaker. I think I'll avoid the rush and start hating you now. =2 10. i em a sempl man lock for a sempl woman to have fun weth go out to denr moves wach the sun set to gethr caping hiking boting bick riding woking wach tv i lock to cook b,b,q Please make friends with your spell check. =1 TIE-BREAKER: RECENTLY SEPARATED, FROM MY BABY'S MAMA..NO, BUT REALLY....NEVER LIE,NEVER CHEAT,SMELL MY FEET. Your baby mama?! Sweet fancy Moses, you call your ex-wife your baby mama? Don't worry. I'm not going to smell your feet on my way out. =2 Epiphany's Total Points = 20. Tied with Linda for 2nd place. Tie-breaker answer brought score to 22. 1. I don't know if I want to get married again. I can be ready in 10 minutes or less. And I can be gone in two minutes or less. =2 2. When you wash the dishes it turns me on. When you get in your car and drive away it makes me ecstatic. =2 3. I am new to the on-line scene and am not a bar hoper. I try not to hope too much in bars either. =1 4. Life's trivial questions shall go unanswered for now. The basics though shall be revealed. I am not good at this but I shall give it a go. Guess the answer to that trivial question has been revealed - basically you're definitely no good at this! =3 5. I wear nice cloths. If it's true that cloths make the man then yours must make you home alone on a Friday night - dusting. =3 6. I'll just start off right now by apologizing, because I'm sure that I will screw up something or say something stupid, so I'm sorry. Yes you did and yes you are. =2 7. I just turned 45, which is almost 7 in dog years. Good boy, now take a walk! =2 8. My ideal match would look like an angle but the devil on the inside. And my ideal match would know how to spell. =2 9. If you litter, or do not recycle, I will not like you. Yup, that's a deal breaker. Sometimes, I say things like yup, and dang it Great, we shall recycle you back into the dating pool with the other compost. Yup, that's what we'll do! =1 10. i em a sempl man lock for a sempl woman to have fun weth go out to denr moves wach the sun set to gethr caping hiking boting bick riding woking wach tv i lock to cook b,b,q You definitely have the lock on being sempl! =2 TIE-BREAKER: RECENTLY SEPARATED, FROM MY BABY'S MAMA..NO, BUT REALLY....NEVER LIE,NEVER CHEAT,SMELL MY FEET. Speaking of feet, mine are going to beat on out of here now. =1

Linda's Total Points = 20 Tied with Epiphany for 2nd place. + 1 point Tie-breaker = 21

See Bud's answers in his weekly column at WTIT: Tape Radio Blog 1. I don't know if I want to get married again. I can be ready in 10 minutes or less. If you don’t know, how can you be ready so fast? 2. When you wash the dishes it turns me on. When you say such things it makes me sick. 3. I am new to the on-line scene and am not a bar hoper. You should always have hope. Bars didn’t work out and you think this is better? What are you thinking? You can’t buy them drinks and you fill out applications! 4. Life's trivial questions shall go unanswered for now. The basics though shall be revealed. I am not good at this but I shall give it a go. We agree. You are NOT good at this. You should “give it a go” and leave. 5. I wear nice cloths. I assume wash clothes. You got kinda a quilt thing going? 6. I'll just start off right now by apologizing, because I'm sure that I will screw up something or say something stupid, so I'm sorry. I bet every ex of yours would agree with you. It is also the reason there will not be future ex’s. 7. I just turned 45, which is almost 7 in dog years. Hi. I’d like you to meet Fido. 8. My ideal match would look like an angle but the devil on the inside. A right or left angle? And what side shall the devil be? Geez. Sorry. Too much thought involved. 9. If you litter, or do not recycle, I will not like you. Yup, that's a deal breaker. Sometimes, I say things like yup, and dang it. Sometimes I say “Go suck an egg.” 10. i w eman lock for a sempl woman to have fun weth go out to denr moves This is an eye chart, right? I am not expected to respond to this. TIE-BREAKER: RECENTLY SEPARATED, FROM MY BABY'S MAMA..NO, BUT REALLY....NEVER LIE,NEVER CHEAT,SMELL MY FEET. Why do I think smelling his feet might be the safest option?

1st place - back to defend his title - Bond from Bond's Big Leather Couch

2nd place - EpiphanyAlone from the blog of the same name.

3rd place - Linda from Are We There Yet?

Congratulations to all!