March 26, 2007

The Dating Profiles Comeback Challenge (Round 20)Winner

The Contestants: Walk of Fame Animated codes - Walk of Fame Animated codes - Walk of Fame Animated codes - Walk of Fame Animated codes - Walk of Fame Animated codes - Walk of Fame Animated codes - Walk of Fame Animated codes -

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NOTE: Bud is a silent contestant and playing just for fun. I did not score his answers.
Who will tickle my funny bone this week and win the prize? What IS the prize?
There is no prize.
Just a badge and untold fame and glory.
Trying a new color scheme. Hope you can read it better. If not, I will try again.
3 points = light blue
2 points = Yellow
1 point = Orange

1. His headline reads Man in Tree. He continues.....I love the outdoors. What's missing is someone to share it with. My biggest problem is deciding which direction to go once the weekend gets here."
Turnbaby: Hmmmm know what --those thumb thingies--they can help you hold the compass--just sayin'
Bond: You live in a tree, you have no one to share the outdoors with, and you don’t have a direction…Exactly what I am looking for Chita without a clue.Ian: Well, I’m going to go out on a limb here and suggest that somebody needs his feet on the ground.Anyhow: See! I told you those mythical living tree creatures exist! Only difference is they only wake up and move about during the weekends!
SGT DUB: I’m a lumberjack and I’m ok, I chop down trees, I wear high heels, Suspenders and a bra. I wish I'd been a girlie, Just like my dear Mama.Spinnerz: I heard this joke about a guy who broke his arm raking leaves....he fell out of the tree. Was that you?
Bud: Mister, you got to get out of the tree. The direction is “down”.

2. I also spend my weekends working with children, but I have to give that up, because I'm getting tired of working 7 days a week. Give me a chance to show you how sincere I am.

Turnbaby: Hmm-you giving up time with needy children so you can spend that time with a lascivious moi--priceless!!!!!
Bond: A man that will give up working with children…Of course I believe you are sincere…sincerely an ass.Ian: This guy has Father of the Year written all over him. Breed with him; you won’t be sorry.
Anyhow: So you're a victim of child labour too? you poor thing.SGT DUB: Was this your plea to the judge at your trial or a pick up line?
Spinnerz: Sincerely, don't botherBud: About what exactly? Being tired? You don’t need any chances.

3. I want you to bounce with joy when you find I'm your new guy.

Turnbaby: A threesome?!?! I hardly know you !
Bond: I would like to bounce you right into the middle of the road.Ian: This guy watches too many women jogging
Anyhow: I'd rather play dead.
SGT DUB: Whoa, slow down there, I think the bridge is out up ahead.

Spinnerz: I see you finally gave up the blowup dolls for beach balls
Bud: Go bounce yourself. It’s not happening.

4. Im looking for someone that knows the difference between love and infatuation because I wont settle for someone to just pass the time away. If it comes down to it I will just get puppies the rest of my life.

Turnbaby: Reporting you to the ASPCA!
Bond: What scares me is that it doesn’t appear your puppies ever grow into dogs. What happens as I age? I am also fond of apostrophes and won’t spend my life with someone who abuses them.Ian: Because who else can be fed the same food day after day, leashed, caged, and still wag their tail for you? I mean besides Paris Hilton…Anyhow: Would you like to get to know my Oxford dictionary?
SGT DUB: Pet Smart has a sell going on.
Spinnerz: 1-800-dog-poundBud: God, but then wouldn’t your life “go” to the dogs?

5. I'll tell you this, I have had a lot of mountains in my life and I have stood on top of them all so that I can see the valleys below and know who I am.

Turnbaby: So my 'humps' won't impress you then. Oh well
Bond: And that would be the king looking down on the little people?Ian: His favorites were the Grand Tetons, of course, but only when he gets to explore the valley below them. Ladies and Gentlemen, Sir Edmund Hillary.Anyhow: I don't think I'd want anybody to stand on top of MY mountains! You sadist!
SGT DUB: When you have walked through the valleys and looked up, give me a call.Spinnerz: Another junkyard rat trolling for leftovers.
Bud: I am willing to bet you do not know how big an ass you are.

6. Sometimes i get serious about life and living.But we can't take it to serious because nobody gets out alive. So, you can see i'm a realist. I would like to have someone to get old with, but it is not a must in my life.
Turnbaby: well my 'serious' meter is set on 11Bond: May I introduce you to guy #4 who only wants puppies? I think you both have so much in common.
Ian: Glad he’s accepted the fact he will truly be alone FOREVER.Anyhow: I would like to see how losers come up with these type of pickup lines, but it is not a must in my life too
SGT DUB: Huh? I’m sorry, did I dose off again?
Spinnerz: Well there's 10 seconds of my life I'll never get backBud: Huh? But him back in his cage.

7. My best assets are my open mindedness and my belief that everyone is essentially good at heart. Luckily, I have no faults.Turnbaby: Shockingly I find that not shocking.Bond: And do you live on the mountaintop and look down on all of us who are actually human?
Ian: There are none so blind as those who will not see.
Anyhow: You must be VERY openminded to believe that you have no faults.SGT DUB: While you are being open minded, let’s cover those faults…
Spinnerz: I used to be conceited but now I'm perfect
Bud: Everyone is good at heart? Hello! Hitler? W? Stalin? Pee Wee Herman? “No brains” sir, not “no faults”.

8. Electrician Needs Positive Charge
Turnbaby: Realitician Needs Reality CheckBond: Come and stick your finger in this little socket and we can help with that.Ian: But for some reason, he’s encountering a lot of resistance. Sounds like a bad ohm-en to me.
Anyhow: Have you tried sticking your tongue into a live socket?
SGT DUB: I called for a plumber, stick your positive charge in the backed up toilet and let the sparks fly.
Spinnerz: Here's a bobby pin, see that socket over there?Bud: Right over the nearest cliff.

9. I'm a little shy at first but warm up with in a few minuets.

Ahh I do so love the old Romantic dances *sweet smile*
Bond: Personally I like rock and roll and have never been a fan of minuets and those damn harpsichords, but whatever turns you on.Ian: And later, a sonata…and finally, he’ll wait until the fat lady sings. And wait…and wait…and wait
Anyhow: Does that include the parts where I scream at you for stepping on my feet?
SGT DUB: Great, a band geek
Spinnerz: Yes, ballroom dancing is fun, but you've already turned into a pumpkin
Bud: I gotta dance to warm you. Who made this rule up?

10. I am Trustworthy, LOYAL, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent. I try to do a good deed daily and to be prepared for anything that might happen.Turnbaby: So how do you really feel about earning your naughty badge?Bond: OH man, guy # 4 is a huge dog lover, but you may just have to fight guy # 6 for him, or maybe a ménage a trois is in your future.
Ian: I can also tie fifty different kinds of knots, start a fire without matches, and make a bark canoe. Want to see my patches?Anyhow: You should start going out with contestant number 4. He seems to know a good dog when he sees one.
SGT DUB: I’m an escaped convict who has been living in the streets for the last few weeks, are you prepared for what might happen next?Spinnerz: Fetch!!!
Bud: I am squeamish, disloyal, hurtful, mean, bratty, disobedient, depressed, lavish, scared, dirty and irreverent. Bite me.

Congratulations to....

Bond from The Couch: 16 points (2 wins in a row!)
Ian from EDog's Everything Page: 13 points
Spinnerz from My Life As We Think I Know It: 10 points
Thanks for playing. You're all hilarious.

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Turnbaby said...

LOL Congrats Bondbaby!!

And congrats to MIMI--we got a little naughty and still made it past the censors! Tee hee

Bond said...

Feeling a Sally Field moment coming on....

Mimi Lenox said...

Censor? What censor?
She must have been on vacation this week....Oh. No. That's next week.

Mimi Lenox said...

If you sprout wings I'm outta here.
And I'm taking back your badge, buster!

Sanni said...

*LOL* I SO SO needed a good laugh - thanks to everyone... and congrats to Vinny =)

ian said...

Bond's bringin' it, yo.

Congrats, brutha Bond!


SGT DUB said...

Bond, funny Bond, great job again, the competition is getting tougher each week. congrats to everyone.

Sunrunner said...

Congrats Bond!

I have to say I liked a couple of the answers to #10 the best, especially Sgt Dub's and Bud's. This has been fun reading these every week!

Sunrunner a.k.a. Mrs. Ian